I would say “not necessarily”. I have nothing against self-control but I
think it is smart to limit the need for it.
I have two suggestions. The first
is fit
value-based actions into day-to-day life. For example, if I value creativity and I want
to become a better portrait painter, I will probably make more progress if I
start to sketch people on the bus than if I try to set up a proper studio to do
portraits. Both studio and bus-sketching
will move me towards my goal, but the first demands relatively little
self-control – just put a drawing pad and pencil in my backpack. The second may require a lot of will power to
save money to rent a studio and buy art supplies or arrange for a model to sit
for me. Big actions will be more
susceptible to ego depletion so I will make more progress if small
value-related actions are part of my routine.
The second suggestion is frame your value in an inspiring
way. In research carried out in
our lab with people working on articulating and acting on their values (Fitzpatrick
et al., 2016), we found that values that lead to change often had an inspirational
quality. People who changed were “touched”
or “lifted up” by their values. Perhaps
the inspiration meant that they needed less self-control. The inspirational quality of a value is
personal for me. When I think about my most important value, I
say to myself, “I want to leave the world a better place than I found it.” That phrase moves me. I could say “I want to make a contribution.” It means about the same thing. But only the first one moves me. When I have to do something that is difficult
and I can think of that phrase, it seems to take self-control off the
table. If you have identified a value
that you think is important, ask yourself, “Does it inspire me?” If not, you may need to use more of your
self-control muscles to turn it into action.
Reference
Baumeister, R.F.
(2014). Self-regulation, ego depletion and inhibition. Neuropsychologia,
65, 313-319. http://dx.doi.org/10.1016/j.neuropsychologia.2014.08.012
Fitzpatrick, M., Henson, A., Grumet, R.,
Poolokasingham, G., Foa, C., Comeau, T., & Predergast, C. (2016). Challenge,
focus, inspiration and support: Processes of values clarification and
congruence. Journal of Contextual
and Behavioral Science http://dx.doi.org/10.1016/j.jcbs.2016.02.001
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